What I needed to know about suicide 20 years ago

September 15, 2024 Lee Hartman

Suicide is a leading cause of death in the United States. One person dies by suicide every 11 minutes. Additionally, rates of suicide have risen considerably since 2020, with disproportionately high rates of suicide in men, American Indian/Alaska Native populations, and persons 85 years or older, among others.

As someone who lost two close friends to suicide before I turned 30, I am relieved to see the increase in suicide awareness and suicide prevention information each September in honor of Suicide Awareness Month, but sometimes the amount of information can be overwhelming. Below is a short list of what I wish I knew about suicide 20 years ago.

Ask directly. Some people think asking about suicide will “put the idea in someone’s head.” This is not true. Research shows asking directly can be a deterrent and provides an opportunity for that person to talk openly about their feelings. It’s important to avoid vague language. “Are you thinking about killing yourself?” is what I use.

Ask follow-up questions. If someone expresses suicidal thoughts, you may feel like you shouldn’t ask too many questions but following up about planning is necessary to help you know what to do next. Some questions to ask include:

Have you thought about how you would kill yourself?
Have you decided when you would kill yourself?
Do you own a firearm or have access to one?
Do you have access to prescription medications or anything else that you could use to kill yourself?

If the individual answers yes to any planning questions, professional help should be sought immediately via 911, 988, or a crisis stabilization center such as Valeo. If an individual answers no to planning questions, connect that person with a professional as soon as possible (same day is preferable) to develop a safety plan. Do not leave the person alone.

Most suicidal crises are extremely short. Research tells us most suicide attempts are impulsive. For at least half of suicide attempts, the time between first considering suicide to attempting suicide is very short – 10 minutes or less. This means the window for intervention is incredibly small, so act quickly if suicidal thoughts are suspected or verbalized. This also means talking or distracting a person in crisis may be helpful, as it could delay an attempt long enough for the crisis to pass.

When someone starts to get better, pay more attention. Support-givers shouldn’t assume the danger has passed if someone starts to get better. Research shows most people who die by suicide do so within three months of the beginning of a period of improvement. As support-givers, we need to be even more aware of shifts in behavior or thinking and act quickly if something feels off.

Support-givers can call 988 for assistance, too. The 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline provides free and confidential support to people in suicidal crisis AND to those who are assisting someone in a crisis.

If you or a loved one are struggling with mental health challenges, professional help is available. Valeo’s Crisis Center, 400 SW Oakley Avenue in Topeka, is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for walk-in mental health emergencies. In case of a behavioral health crisis, contact 988 or the Valeo 24-Hour Crisis Line at 785-234-3300.

– by Mikki Burcher, Certified Adult Mental Health First Aid Instructor

Valeo Behavioral Health Care

785-233-1730

Crisis Services

400 SW Oakley, Topeka, KS 66606

24 Hour Crisis Line: 785-234-3300

National Suicide Prevention Life Line

Call or text 988 anytime 24/7/365

Shawnee County Suicide Prevention Coalition

SCSPC.org

Family Service and Guidance Center (18 and under)

325 SW Frazier, Topeka, KS 66606